In the aftermath of Wednesday's Presidential debate and yet another stumbling, blustering, rambling, incoherent performance by Cheeto Mussolini some pundit described Trump's willfully ignorant attempts to bluff his way through answers to questions he had clearly given little thought to as akin to a high-school student trying to deliver a "book report". That's the sort of thing that is regularly said but this time it led to an immediate response on Twitter as thousands of people gleefully converted that throwaway line to a performance art tweet-storm. After seeing this I went on my first official Twitter tear myself with almost twenty "Trump Book Report" Tweets. OK; that's a tad excessive, I was clearly in the zone. I need to take a break. Read a book. Take a walk or something.
But first; In tribute to David Letterman (come back Dave we really need you, along with Jon Stewart) here are my personal top ten Trump Book Reports;
I stared out fairly conventionally;
Daibhid James @DiamondDaibhidJ Oct 20
Frodo was really low energy. I'd build a wall and make make Mordor pay for it. Bigly. Make Middle Earth Great Again! #TrumpBookReport #Trump
Daibhid James @DiamondDaibhidJ Oct 20
"Edgar Allan Poe was weak, stop all Raven immigration until we can figure out what the Hell is going on. Not good" #TrumpBookReport #Trump
Daibhid James @DiamondDaibhidJ Oct 20
Robin Hood robs the rich to pay the poor? Thanks Obama. Not Good. Sad. #TrumpBookReport #Trumpland
Daibhid James @DiamondDaibhidJ Oct 20
#TrumpBookReport "1984"; "Big Brother is a strong leader. Stronger than Obama. He's laughing at us. Not Good"
#TrumpBookReports; "Zorro"; We have to get rid of these bad Mexican hombres. Build A Wall" #Trumpland #groperinchief #Debates2016 #Trump
#Trumpbookreports; "Killing a Mockingbird is for losers. Eric & Don jr are real big game trophy hunters. Big time" #Trumpland #groperinchief
#Trumpbookreports; "Aslan the Lion brought peace & love. So Eric & Don jr shot him. Make Narnia great again!" #Trumpland #groperinchief #GOP
Then started to get more obscure;
Daibhid James @DiamondDaibhidJ Oct 20
#TrumpBookReport "Heart Of Darkness";"Kurtz is really low energy. I was opposed to the jungle trip from the beginning Ask Sean Hannity" #GOP
Daibhid James @DiamondDaibhidJ Oct 20
#TrumpBookReport Josef Conrad's "Secret Agent";"There's no proof there's a Russian agent. Probably some 400 lb guy in parents basement. Sad"
#Trumpbookreports;"All The Kings Men: Demagogue gets elected. Big Time. Then he gets shot. I blame Crooked Hillary. Not Good" #Trumpland
#TrumpBookReport; "Raisin In The Sun"; The Blacks are living in Hell and it's Obama's fault.Sad" #Trumpland #groperinchief #Debates2016 #GOP
#TrumpBookReports; "1001 Arabian Nights"; Very dark. Something's wrong here. We need to get to the bottom of this. Not good" #debate #Trump
#trumpbookreports "The Art Of War"; I'm smarter than the generals. Really smart. I deserve a medal for not getting VD. So far." #Trumpland
#Trumpbookreports "The Good Earth; Chiina is laughing at us. I'll hit em with 35% tarrifs. Except for my ties. I make the best ties" #Trump
And darker. Way darker;
Daibhid James @DiamondDaibhidJ
Moby Dick "Ahab was really low energy, I would have bombed the shit out of that whale. Also sounds like a Muslim. Not good." #TrumpBookReport
#Trumpbookreports "Lair Of The White Worm; Probably about Lyin Ted Cruz. His dad killed JFK. I read that. His wife a 4 Not good!" #Trumpland
#TrumpBookReport "Mordor isn't sending us their best Orcs. They're killers, they're rapists and some I assume are good Orcs" #Trumpland #GOP
#trumpbookreports;"Oedipus Rex grabbed his mother's pussy because his daughter was only a three at best. Look at that face." #TrumpLand #GOP
Daibhid James @DiamondDaibhidJ Oct 20
#TrumpBookReport "Tale Of Two Cities"; "It was the best of times. Then black people moved into my building. I had casinos in those cities. #Trump
#TrumpBookReport "Diary Of Anne Frank"; "She's a four right now but in a few years I'll be dating her. Where are my TicTacs?" #GroperInChief
And big finish, drum-roll please;
#TrumpBookReports;"Mein Kampf";My second favorite book. Almost as good as "Art of The Deal".Everybody says so" #Trump #groperinchief #debate
OK that's actually 17 not 10. Apparently I have slightly more self control than the Tweeter-In-Chief. I'm guessing he's probably not actually read any of those books though. Except "Mein Kampf" of course. Bigly.
Named after Alan Freed, the original Rock and Roll DJ and dedicated mostly to music & radio. See also my Classic Film & TV blog @ http://thesilverscreenchronicles.blogspot.ca/ For My CIUT 89.5fm in Toronto radio playlists; http://moondogsplaylists.blogspot.com/
Friday 21 October 2016
Friday 20 May 2016
Some Jaw-Droppingly Awful Album Covers
Kids these days. What with their MP3 downloads and wave files they are missing out on one of the great pleasures of actually buying an album; the cover art. Remember the fun of opening up a gatefold sleeve? Remember avant garde covers like the Rolling Stones "Sticky Fingers" with it's zipper, or the Velvet Underground's with it's peel-off banana (both by Andy Warhol)? Public Image Ltd's "Metal Box"? Savage Republic's exquisite silk screened covers? The Famine's multi-page books of photo-copier art? Fingerprintz second album which was done as a series of punch-out postcards of pulp fiction art? (BTW once you had punched out those cards what were you supposed to put the album in?) Sigh. But of course not ever cover can be a gem. Here are a few classics of cosmically wrong-headed cover art the likes of which we may never see again.
I think this illegal in several Republican states.
OK; this definitely is.
It's like a lineup on Law & Order SVU Senior Citizen's Edition.
Get your mind out of the gutter.
I didn't even know Paula Deen did a calypso album.
Did you know Borat did a polka album? Well now you do.
Soon to be providing musical entertainment for the Republican Convention.
Along with these guys
I don't know if the fact that John Buft was actually Julie's father makes this more creepy. Actually yes. Yes it does.
You try and tell Tex to put out those cigarettes. I dare you. (BTW Tex ended up dying from complications from smoking).
The Bay City Rollers did not age well
Most of these (except for Tex Williams) are hopelessly obscure with micro-budgets but this guy was the singer for Dexy's Midnight Runners who had an actual hit and on a major label so WTF?
This is the sort of thing that Max Webster could once sort of pull off. But not these guys. Or Kevin Rowland.
If this isn't the soundtrack to a bad horror film I shall be very disappointed.
Never mind that horror movie, this will haunt my dreams.
They seem perfectly nice but these three are personally responsible for creating their own hole in the ozone layer.
Since he's a Christian I have to point out that Leviticus (the book in the Bible that bans homosexuality) also bans wearing "garments woven from different types of thread" which would certainly cover polyester, and whatever is going on here.
OK now that is entirely way too much hairspray.
Look kids; it's the Definitely Not Mod Squad
And on that farm they had some sweater-vests E-I-E-I-O
Wait; are Superman and Jesus going to fight? Hard to know who to root for here. Also is it just me or does Superman look black?
Would you like fries with that?
For those who thought Richard Simmons was too macho.
Roy Orbison's little known "Ice Cream Gospel" album.
I'm going to assume this was a language barrier thing, probably sounded less dirty in Russian
Yeah you made fun of Flavor Flav's gold teeth but here's the alternative. Happy now?
"I hate each and every member of my audience"
So is that a rusty french horn?
Well; he seems like a chill dude. Bonus points for the boots.
I know this is technically not an album cover but now I actually wish they did record an album.
The phrase "Phoning It In" comes to mind.
I think this illegal in several Republican states.
OK; this definitely is.
It's like a lineup on Law & Order SVU Senior Citizen's Edition.
Get your mind out of the gutter.
I didn't even know Paula Deen did a calypso album.
Did you know Borat did a polka album? Well now you do.
Soon to be providing musical entertainment for the Republican Convention.
Along with these guys
I don't know if the fact that John Buft was actually Julie's father makes this more creepy. Actually yes. Yes it does.
You try and tell Tex to put out those cigarettes. I dare you. (BTW Tex ended up dying from complications from smoking).
The Bay City Rollers did not age well
Most of these (except for Tex Williams) are hopelessly obscure with micro-budgets but this guy was the singer for Dexy's Midnight Runners who had an actual hit and on a major label so WTF?
This is the sort of thing that Max Webster could once sort of pull off. But not these guys. Or Kevin Rowland.
If this isn't the soundtrack to a bad horror film I shall be very disappointed.
Never mind that horror movie, this will haunt my dreams.
They seem perfectly nice but these three are personally responsible for creating their own hole in the ozone layer.
Since he's a Christian I have to point out that Leviticus (the book in the Bible that bans homosexuality) also bans wearing "garments woven from different types of thread" which would certainly cover polyester, and whatever is going on here.
OK now that is entirely way too much hairspray.
Look kids; it's the Definitely Not Mod Squad
And on that farm they had some sweater-vests E-I-E-I-O
Wait; are Superman and Jesus going to fight? Hard to know who to root for here. Also is it just me or does Superman look black?
Would you like fries with that?
For those who thought Richard Simmons was too macho.
Roy Orbison's little known "Ice Cream Gospel" album.
I'm going to assume this was a language barrier thing, probably sounded less dirty in Russian
Yeah you made fun of Flavor Flav's gold teeth but here's the alternative. Happy now?
"I hate each and every member of my audience"
So is that a rusty french horn?
Well; he seems like a chill dude. Bonus points for the boots.
I know this is technically not an album cover but now I actually wish they did record an album.
The phrase "Phoning It In" comes to mind.
Labels:
David Bowie,
Dexy's Midnight Runners,
Tex Williams
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